Gender equality has not been achieved in our society. Women still do not have the same rights and opportunities as men. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Gender
Equality is a heavily discussed topic. Some people argue that
women
still do not have the same rights and
opportunities
as
men
,
although
much effort has been made to achieve
gender
equality. I
support
this
idea because many
women
have fewer professional and educational
opportunities
than
men
.
Firstly
, it is evident that
women
have fewer
opportunities
than
men
because
women
are less likely to be hired and promoted than
men
. Having the same rights and
opportunities
means that both
women
and
men
have access to the same professional
opportunities
.
However
, many companies evaluate
women
and
men
, considering their
gender
.
Additionally
, companies still have a glass ceiling that deters
women
from getting promoted.
Therefore
, it is clear that
women
have less access to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
professional
opportunities
.
Moreover
,
women
have less
support
from their families than their male family members. A lot of people in Korea still have stereotypes that
women
should stay home and
support
their families. There are many cases where some parents do not
support
their daughter the same as their son. Some girls sacrifice themselves because of that mindset.
Besides
, some people think that
women
should stay home and bring up their children. Even though both
women
and
men
have the right to pursue a career, these kinds of thoughts have led
women
to stop pursuing a career and be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
housemaker. To sum up, it is undeniable that
gender
equality has not been achieved yet because
women
have fewer chances to get promoted and have less
support
than
men
.
Submitted by gaingloryb on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: