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many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. do you agree or disagree ?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #health #people
some food and beverages
product
 produced by factory has a significant
level
 of
sugar
 in their ingredients. which cause several health issues. in
this
 essay, I will explain and elaborate why sweetness
products
 should come at a higher
price
 in order to influence
people
 to consume lower levels of
sugar
. high
level
 of
sugar
 often found in factory-made
products
. meanwhile,
sugar
 is the root cause of some health problems. because consuming sugary
products
 leads to the accumulation of glucose in our blood. These accumulations usually trigger a serious illness
such
 as diabetes.
nevertheless
, it is important to control the frequency of sugary manufactured
product
 consumption. I support a policy where the
price
 of food and drink manufactured
products
 is higher in order to encourage
people
 to consume fewer
sugar
products
. because in my opinion, the main reason behind purchasing decision is because the
price
 is cheap.
thus
, if the
price
 is high,
people
 who want to consume high levels of
sugar
products
 will think twice before deciding to buy. ,
,,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
first
Add a comma
,first
show examples
 they will think about the
price
.
also
, they consider the high
level
 of
sugar
 contains in the
product
.
furthermore
, they are well aware of the health problem and decide to choose cheaper yet healthy
products
instead
. based on
this
 argumentation, I agree with increasing the
price
 of sugary
products
.
finally
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
sugar
 that contains in the manufactured food and drink
product
 is on an extremely high
level
.
this
 extreme
level
 of
sugar
 will lead to serious illnesses like diabetes. because of that, I agree that there must an effective method in order to influence
people
 to be more aware of their bodies. in
this
 context, pulling up the
price
 of sugary
products
 on the market is very effective.
Submitted by serlyayus on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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