IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Universities should accept equal members of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#universities #members #students
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In the contemporary era, examination competition increasing day by day among admission in tertiary institutions. So,
Add an article
the academy
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academy
Fix the agreement mistake
academies
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 should give equal seats for both genders in their study subjects. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I disagree with
this
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 statement up to some extent.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
Firstly
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, every
universities
Change to a singular noun
university
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 should accept admission on the basis of their grades because talented pupils get easily seat
on
Change preposition
in
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 the best learning institutions as well as show their learning skills.
Secondly
Linking Words
, every
students
Change to a singular noun
student
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 have their own choice which
want
Change the verb form
wants
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 to learn the subject.so, sometimes men are more present in the same class as compared to women.
For instance
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, one survey conducted in Chandigarh University noticed that females are more present rather than males in bio class.
Hence
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, pupils accepted just on their marks and their learning skills.
On the other hand
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, why should obtained equal numbers of individuals in studies subjects
.
Change the punctuation
?
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 The main reason is that both genders obtained equal studies opportunities and scholarships which assist
they
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 in making a bright future. In ancient times, females have limited seats for study so nowadays, they should be accepted equally not only in study but
also
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 in other fields
such
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 as sports and jobs. In the conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 a majority of universities accepted students equally, other requirements are
also
Linking Words
 essential for universities as well as students because they assist to encourage the reputation in society.
Submitted by tanvirkaur.0184 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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