Some people think that teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #teenagers #work #time #community #teenager #society

Community

service

is a great deed and some people think that no wage

community

work

if done by adolescents in their spare time can be fruitful for not only the

community

but themselves too.

However

, I do not fully agree with the above statement and

this

essay will discuss the reasons below.

First

of all, there is no doubt about the benefits of doing

community

work

regardless of the pay as doing something for society will always be returned manifolds.

For example

, when we take care of the elderly, they often bless us for our future endeavours and

also

share their invaluable life experience which can help an individual in tackling similar situations if they arise.

Moreover

, teenagers meet all sorts of people while working for

this

noble cause and can increase their network as well as learn to deal with real problems.

This

will result in their personal growth tremendously as well as help them grow in their professional life. So it is undeniable that

community

work

will make

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society more prosperous and stable as there will be

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

problems to tend to. Be that as it may, getting paid for

this

service

is a different issue. Sometimes , teenagers can lose interest in things

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

do not give tangible rewards.

Therefore

, giving a wage, even if it is small, will definitely attract more people

towards

Change preposition

show examples

community

service

Moreover

, they will do their

work

even more efficiently because of the lure of pay. In conclusion, I think if a teenager volunteers

community

service

without considering the wage, it is great on his part but giving payment will help them stay motivated for

this

job so I do not fully agree with the given statement.

Submitted by gupta.manish867 on Tue Feb 01 2022

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that teenagers should be required to do unpaid work in their free time to help the local community. They believe this would benefit both the individual teenager and society as a whole. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people today are worried about the large quantities of waste produced by ordinary households. What problems are caused by household waste? What are the solution?

Governments should spend money on railways than roads. To what to extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that government should spend money on building new train lines,while others believe that improving public transport is more beneficial.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.