IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

should criminals be sent to prison or should they do something else as a punishment? Explain your opinion and give your reason.

Throughout history,
Crime
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 has always been a danger to
society
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. According to the development of
society
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, many people think that we should put
criminals
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 in prison and let them do other things as
punishment
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. But in my opinion, depending on the
crime
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 of the offender, the appropriate
punishment
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 can be given to them. In the old days, the Government used prisons as a place to hold or torture
criminals
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 and even pronounce death sentences. Today, many constitutions have been introduced and are very merciful to the guilty. They will give appropriate punishments according to the
crime
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 of the offender. Sending
criminals
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 to prison is only a deterrent, not reducing the
crime
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 rate and victims cannot accept the harm they have suffered due to crimes caused to themselves or their families.
This
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 can be a burden on the government budget. Give work to
criminals
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 as a
punishment
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 and they can contribute a part to the development of
society
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. That will make
criminals
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 have a good outlook on life and change for the better.
On the other hand
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, Thieves, robbers, rapists or even murderers need special treatment. It is not right or even dangerous to release them from prison
,
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apply
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 because they are still a threat to our
society
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. Severe
punishment
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 for these crimes is necessary and can be a deterrent to
such
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 potential
criminals
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. That will give people a
second
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 thought before committing a
crime
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 and it is a mental comfort for the victims. Education contributes to raising children's awareness of
crime
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 and can reduce future
crime
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 rates. In short, we can pardon
criminals
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 who have committed misdemeanours and severely punish those who are still a threat to our
society
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. That can ensure the safety of citizens and reduce
crime
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 rates.
Furthermore
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, it is both a
punishment
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 for the heartless offenders as well as a consolation for the innocent victims.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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