IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people say that protecting the environment is the government’s responsibility. Others believe that every individual should be responsible for it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #environment #government’s #responsibility
When it comes to preservation, it is true that every individual is responsible for protecting the
environment
. In my opinion, I side with the view that the
government
 should protect the
environment
.
To begin
 with, there are some
people
 who claim that every individual is more responsible for the
environment
 than the
government
. One of the prime reasons for
this
 is most of the
environment
 is contaminated by every individual. More specifically, most
people
 who live in the world use plastic cups, their own car, clear water and so on every single day.
In other words
,
people
 who live in modern society are common to generate pollution.
Therefore
, every individual needs to protect the
environment
 respectively. Despite the points mentioned above, I believe that the
government
 has to be more responsible for the
environment
.
First
 of all,
people
 who live in the country are restricted by the
government
. The
government
 has the right to make a better society, complying with laws that they need.
For example
, when the
government
 needs
people
 to minimize using plastic cups and bags, the
government
 makes a law regarding extra
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
 for plastic.
As a result
, the
government
 has a significant influence on the
environment
 and it is easy for
then
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
 to control every
individuals
Change to a singular noun
individual
show examples
. In conclusion, even though some
people
 may believe that every individual is responsible for the
environment
, for the reasons mentioned above, I would argue that the
government
 has to control
people
 in the country to protect the
environment
.
Submitted by abcd1004bbbb on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: