Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behaviour). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#think #schools #rewards #students #results #it’s #reward #success #sports #music #behaviour

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According to some views, students should be rewarded due to their academic achievements.

However

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, other people think, that rewarding should be bounded with other achievements, in sports, music and good manner.

This

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essay will discuss both sides of views to

this

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opinion. In my perspective, academic

results

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should be in priority, because they correspond to the main purposes of education. It often happens when individuals with excellent academic

success

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, may have negative

behaviour

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or less

success

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in other spheres. Their intelligence helps them to become a good specialist in the future, despite their bad manner or absence of

success

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in other spheres.

For instance

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, one of the most remarkable people in our history, Steve Jobs. He had been expelled from University due to his bad

behaviour

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However

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finally

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, he had become one of those who have created The Apple. His academic knowledge, intelligence help him to become a successful entrepreneur and inventor.

Therefore

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, students' estimates must be based on their academic

results

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. Other types of activities must complement an academic process, and should not influence final estimates.

Nevertheless

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, other people strongly believe, that students’ rewarding must be based on achievements in good

behaviour

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, sports, and music activities.

However

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, should be pointed out that, if a student had low marks in career-oriented subjects and good exceptionally

behaviour

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marks, he/she could not be a good professional in the future.

Moreover

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, all these additional activities in sports and music may take a significant part of the time and may disturb an educational process. Considering the main goal of schools and any other academic institutions, which is meant to express good professionals, the above-mentioned aspects cannot play the main role in

this

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rewarding. Academic

results

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should be in priority. In conclusion, students' academic

results

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should be rewarded in an exceptional way, because only these measures can respond to the main goal of education. Other types of

success

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must have another way of rewarding. In my opinion, schools and universities

firstly

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should rear good specialists, not good sportsmen and musicians. And, even though, good

behaviour

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plays a significant part in the academic process,

this

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part is not the main.

Submitted by ospanovaalma7 on Sun Feb 06 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

354 words

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Some think schools should rewards students who have the best academic results, while others think it’s more important to reward students who achieve other types of success (such as sports, music, and good behaviour). Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

The exploration and development of safe alternatives to fossil fuels should be the most important global priority today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You are planning to go and study English at a school overseas. You would like some information about their courses. Write a letter to the school. In your letter ● ask about the school ● say what kind of accommodation you want ● mention any special requests you have (for example, diet).

In many countries today there are many highly qualified graduates without employment. What factors may have caused this situation and what, in your opinion, can/should be done about it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?