Some people think that zoos are cruel and should be closed down. Others, however, believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Many argue that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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zoos
are unfair for wild
animals
due to animal
crueality
Correct your spelling
cruelty
cruciality
and should have shut down
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
on the other hand
, many agree that
zoos
can be protective for wild
animals
. I strongly believe that
,
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apply
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zoos
are
attraction
Correct article usage
an attraction
show examples
point for many children and educate them but it is very cruel for
animals
because they can't live freely under the constant observation of humans.
People
argue that
,
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apply
show examples
zoos
are very much cruel
for
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to
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animals
because they can't survive in constant human interference and observations. Apart from that,
zoos
are built mostly in
a city areas
Correct the article-noun agreement
city areas
a city area
show examples
and are very congested where
animals
can't even roam around properly and get sick instantly by staying locked in a cage or place because they are habitats to live freely in
natural
Add an article
a natural
show examples
atmosphere and due to that reason many
animals
dead.
Moreover
,
instead
of
zoos
animals
should be moved
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
wild reserved areas so that they can find themselves living in
wild
Add an article
a wild
show examples
natural atmosphere and can survive freely without any human activities. So I
strongly
Add a missing verb
am strongly
show examples
against it to put wild
animals
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zoos
.
However
, many
people
believe that putting wild
animals
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
zoos
are very safe for them especially for endangered
animals
such
as Asia Tigers, Pandas, etc., Where they can be taken
cared
Replace the word
care
show examples
properly
Change preposition
of properly
show examples
by humans. Other than
this
,
zoos
are the attraction point for many
people
and educate children as well.
For instance
, by visiting
zoos
students get to know more about wild
animals
which they have only seen in the
move
Correct your spelling
movie
show examples
or books.
Also
, it is an earning point as well from where
government
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the government
show examples
gets
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
amount of money because it attracts most
people
and children towards it. To sum up,
zoos
are truly unfair for wild
animals
as they can be taken care of by moving them in wild reserved areas,
Also
I prefer to see them in videos or movies rather than seeing them locked in the cage.
Submitted by goswamimanisha403 on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
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