Many people get little or no exercise either during the working day or their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

#people #exercise #time #health

Many people get little or no

exercise

either during the working day or their free

time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and have health problems

as a result

. Working is considered the main reason why

this

is the case, workers should be responsible for solving

this

problem. The biggest factor leading to

this

problem is that do not have free

time

enough since employees always sit down on a chair while they are doing their performance.

For example

, according to the latest research conducted by Bangkok University, it was revealed that 80% of employees of Amazon that working in the office are likely to sit down all day.

This

example shows free

time

plays a major role in a staff

exercise

. In order to solve

this

issue, the manager of companies should take action as soon as possible, The most significant solution to support

this

fact

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

workers should get more facilities to activity ,whereas, they are still at work

time

This

is because an employee will get more active by running and working together. To illustrate

this

, in recent news, it has been reported that most staffs in Binance choose to do work along with running on

exercise

equipment in the official company because they can choose both of activities at in same age.

By doing

Change preposition

Doing

show examples

this

exercise

will increase because it is more comfortable. In conclusion, many people get little or no

exercise

either during the working day or their free

time

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and have health problems

as a result

. In order to combat

this

, workers should get more facilities to

exercise

,whereas, they are still in work

time

Submitted by patchara8633 on Thu Feb 10 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Time constraints
Sedentary lifestyle
Passive leisure activities
Workplace wellness programs
Active commuting
Subsidized
Public awareness
Health benefits
Incentivizing
Accessible public spaces

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Many people get little or no exercise either during the working day or their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

young adults, compared with the of older people. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

As global trade increases, many goods including those we use on a daily basis are produced in other countries and have to be transported long distance. Do the benefits of this trend outweigh the drawbacks?

Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some parts of the world. Today, however, growing worldwide demand has made this a global problem. What are the causes of the increased demand and what measure could governments and individuals take to respond to this problem?

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.