IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many working people get little or no exercise during the work day, and have health problems as a result. -Why do so many people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? -Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #exercise #work #health #-why #-give
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There are many
people
Use synonyms
 who work all
day
Use synonyms
 and do not spend lots of
time
Use synonyms
 getting out and do little or no
exercise
Use synonyms
 during the workday.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it causes
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as obesity.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the
problems
Use synonyms
 of the issue that include the reason about lazy and busy
people
Use synonyms
 and the problem of do not get enough
exercise
Use synonyms
 each
day
Use synonyms
. It will suggest that are helpful to overcome
this
Linking Words
 issue.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are two major
problems
Use synonyms
 with
this
Linking Words
 trend. It is widely known that doing
exercise
Use synonyms
 is known to be beneficial for
health
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, we should spend a lot of work
time
Use synonyms
 to get out and have a brisk walk or take a yoga
course
Use synonyms
 and gym
course
Use synonyms
. There are other
people
Use synonyms
 who are lazy and does not have so much
time
Use synonyms
 to get out and do
exercise
Use synonyms
, they will have so many
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as obesity, stress, tired.
However
Linking Words
, They work so hard and do not spend
time
Use synonyms
 getting out since they want to upgrade their standard of living and want to get out of starving, poverty. In order to tackle
this
Linking Words
 problem, there could be a possible solution.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
for instance
Linking Words
, each
people
Use synonyms
 should spend a lot of
time
Use synonyms
 taking a yoga
course
Use synonyms
, gym
course
Use synonyms
 or go out for walking that will make sense better.
Secondly
Linking Words
, with individuals always working at home and do not have so much
time
Use synonyms
 to go out, they can buy a barbell to do some gym exercises or do 20-minute aerobics. Each one should go to the hospital and check their
health
Use synonyms
 once a month to comprehend individuals'
health
Use synonyms
 issues. In conclusion, the community are changing the daily routine
day
Use synonyms
 by
day
Use synonyms
 as compared to spending more
time
Use synonyms
 to do more
exercise
Use synonyms
 to prevent
health
Use synonyms
problems
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
problems
Use synonyms
 can be tackled if each
people
Use synonyms
 spend a few minutes getting outside and doing more
exercise
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by juliethaonguyen1993 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: