IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or Disagree?

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Different countries around the world , spend their money depending on the requirements of the nation, as well as the availability .
However
Linking Words
 , in the current ,era more
people
Use synonyms
 opine on spending more funds on education rather than , entertainment and sports. Unfortunately , day by day , communities around the world face new problems and they demand new solutions.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, since the population is increasing ,there will be fewer job opportunities in the
future
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 . Due to these factors , I strongly agree with the notion that has been given .
To begin
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 with, communities around the globe face new
challenges
Use synonyms
 every day. Some of them are life-threatening and some lead to suffering for a long. fortunately , with the new ,technology most of these problems getting solved and
people
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 are surviving.
For example
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 ,
people
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 around the world are safe from the current pandemic due to vaccines , which developed due to new sciences.
furthermore
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 ,In the
future
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 generations will need a good education rather than entertainment for the surviving of
this
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 kind of
challenges
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. On the other hand ,with the current population growth rate , there will be a big population in the
future
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. Due to
this
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 , there will be , a massive fight between
people
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 to survive.
As a result
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 of that ,
people
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 who have good skills and knowledge will survive. To illustrate
this
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 , a survey done by An European University has suggested governments make higher and higher educational units to empower
people
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 with knowledge , to face these
future
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challenges
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. In conclusion , there is an opine to governments for spending their funds more on education than pleasure activities and sports. Since
people
Use synonyms
 will suffer more and more
challenges
Use synonyms
 in the
future
Use synonyms
 and there will be high demand for knowledge in the coming years ,
this
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 writer is in strong agreement with the given facts.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental
  • workforce
  • fosters
  • innovation
  • inequality
  • circumstances
  • outcomes
  • hygiene
  • private sector
  • initiatives
  • engaged
  • stability
  • cohesion
  • national pride
  • economic development
  • societal progress
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