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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In many countries teenagers are encouraged to do part time jobs. What's the situation like in your country? What do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of doing part time jobs

#countries #teenagers #part #time #jobs #situation #country
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Nowadays, more and more
adolescents
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 are being encouraged to do part-
time
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jobs
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. In my country, the circumstance of participating in part-
time
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work
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 is difficult and challenging for teenagers. From my perspective, having a half
time
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 job gives more positive impacts than negative effects for both individuals and society. 
To begin
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 with, the majority of the people
support
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 the idea of offering part-
time
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jobs
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 to
adolescents
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 across the world and millions of teenagers
work
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 partially due to their private reasons. I think the most important reason is to earn
money
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 in
order
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 to cover their expenses.
For instance
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, I was born in Mongolia which is one of the developing countries and still encountering a lack of employment.
Although
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 at least one adult from each family has worked in
order
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 to
support
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 his or her family, the wage is absolutely not sufficient for every member of the household.
Therefore
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, most
adolescents
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 look for part-
time
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jobs
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 in
order
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 to help their parents. But unfortunately, the opportunity is restricted due to the deficiency of part-
time
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jobs
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.
However
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, if teenagers had the opportunity to
work
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 up to 20 hours a week, they would learn the quality of
money
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.
For example
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, if I did not
work
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 whether partially or full
time
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, I would never know how hard it is to earn
money
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.
Therefore
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, giving them the chance to experience the trials and quality of a penny is a better option for them.
Secondly
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, It will help society as well. Allowing
adolescents
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 to
work
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 part-
time
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 will help them to spend their
time
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 effectively and avoid any bad habits and activities. From my experience, I remember that when I was at age of 17, I was working as a part-
time
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 employee in a supermarket in my country. Even though I was so exhausted, it taught me how to say no to unimportant activities
such
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 as parties, drinking alcohol, smoking and so on because I was spending my valid
time
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 by working and aiming for
money
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 in
order
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 to
support
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 my needs. In conclusion, many people
support
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 their teenage children to
work
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 at least part-
time
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 because adults know that they will learn so many significant lessons.
Therefore
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,
although
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 the situation of working part-
time
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 is not sufficient for every adolescent in my country, it gives more positive impacts to the one who works partially than disadvantages.
Submitted by khulka.khulan.1 on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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