IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Is mental strength important for success or is it more important to be strong and fit for success in sport.? Discuss both views and give your opinion

#strength #success #sport
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The factors contributing to performance in sport are continually being investigated by
sports
Use synonyms
 scientists and
athletes
Use synonyms
. While some people would argue that a person’s physical
strength
Use synonyms
 determines their
level
Use synonyms
 of performance in sport, I believe that mental conditioning is
also
Linking Words
 a highly important factor. On the one hand,some people believe that physical
strength
Use synonyms
 plays a major role in their performance in sport.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
sports
Use synonyms
 require strong muscular
strength
Use synonyms
 and
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
level
Use synonyms
 of coordination.In fact,in some extreme
sports
Use synonyms
, being able to run fast, lift or throw something very heavy is one of the main aspects of
sports
Use synonyms
. To illustrate,basketball players have to run full court within 30 minutes per game on average and throw as many shots as they can.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
athletes
Use synonyms
 with good physical conditions can heal quickly after injuries. Without strong legs,no competitors can participate at a high
level
Use synonyms
 in
sports
Use synonyms
 competitions. Weightlifting
athletes
Use synonyms
,
for example
Linking Words
, always care about their legs, because legs are a ubiquitous muscle to lift extremely heavyweights.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,I would side with those people who believe that a high
level
Use synonyms
 of
strength
Use synonyms
 and fitness is not the only factor that allows
athletes
Use synonyms
 to win their games. In fact, some professional
athletes
Use synonyms
Add the comma(s)
, in particular,
show examples
in particular
Linking Words
 need to have the determination and focus on training and performing for many years. Certainly, being able to focus and concentrate whilst under pressure during competition is really essential.
In addition
Linking Words
, some
sports
Use synonyms
 players need to stay calm and overcome countless injuries in their long career that they may face.
Therefore
Linking Words
, without good mental health, they may lose their careers due to self-harm when they fight against depression.
For instance
Linking Words
,Durant,a famous basketball player,after being injured for a year due to Achilles injury, with strong mental health,
he
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can come back stronger and play harder than before. To conclude,physical
strength
Use synonyms
 plays an indispensable role,but strong mental health decides how successful the players are in the future.
Submitted by nguyenthuytien1609 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: