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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Living in big cities is bad for people's health. What extend do you agree and disagree?

#cities #people #health
The statement above is very broad. There are many reasons behind a person's well-being failure. It can be a bad diet, unhealthy lifestyle, and living in big
cities
 might be one of its.
Nevertheless
, I am more than sure that living in big
cities
 is only the trigger cause, not the real reason behind a person's
health
 problem. Of course, living in big
cities
 has its advantages and disadvantages. The advantages, indeed, it is easier to access any public facilities
such
 as transportation,
health
 care centre, shopping mall, school, and any other public facilities. At least it happens in my country, which is the inadequate infrastructure still becomes a problem. Now mention about the disadvantages,
firstly
,
people
 who are living in big
cities
 usually commute some distance between home and workplace. It can lead to much time wasted on the way back and forth.
In addition
,
people
also
 work 9 to 5 and sometimes overtime, indeed these lead to a not very good lifestyle. They tend to eat processed food or anything easier to get without looking after their
health
.
Also
, as far as I know, only a smaller number of busy
people
 like I mention above doing exercise to maintain their
health
. They are too tired to do anything on their day off.
Consequently
, if
people
 in big
cities
 continued to live like that, there is no doubt that they would experience
health
 problems in the future.
Finally
, it is not living in big
cities
 that make
people
 experience a
health
 problem, but, it comes from the demand of living in big
cities
.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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