IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019.
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The line graphs illustrate the variation in ownership of electrical appliances and the amount of time used for housework in one country in 1920 and 2019. The figures are given in percentage and
hours
Use synonyms
, respectively. As can be seen from the graphs, the percentages of households with electrical equipment
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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dramatically increased.
while
Linking Words
 the number of
hours
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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housework was gradually declining. The historical trends show the washing machine was more popular than the refrigerator and the vacuum cleaner in 1920, 40%, 30% and nearly 0% of people used it, respectively.
In addition
Linking Words
, there was a slight growth of around 70% in 2019.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
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 the need for refrigerators and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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vacuum cleaner
were
Change the verb form
was
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 significantly growing to hit 100% of households in 2019.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, The number of
hours
Use synonyms
 per week was continuously decreased from 50
hours
Use synonyms
 in 1920 to 20
hours
Use synonyms
 per week in 1960 which two times higher
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2019.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • electrical appliances
  • housework
  • time frame
  • variables
  • trends
  • significant milestones
  • turning points
  • correlation
  • reduction
  • influenced
  • societal implications
  • quality of life
  • gender roles
  • economic implications
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