IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people they spend large part of their free time using smartphones What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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Smartphones
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 are used excessively in
leisure
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time
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, as they are a great source of communication and entertainment, which are the main reasons for using cell
phones
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. In my opinion,
this
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 increasing trend of spending free
time
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 with mobile
phones
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 can be beneficial because they link
people
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 with their loved ones and promote reading skills in the users. Communication is the most significant reason for using cell
phones
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 as human beings are social animals so they prefer to engage themselves in interacting with others in their
leisure
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time
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.
For example
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, internet access on mobile-phone has fulfiled
people
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’s desire of socializing with someone not only in their immediate surroundings but
also
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 overseas. It is
also
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 believed that one of the major reasons for using mobiles is amusement.
For instance
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, these days, not only the youth but
also
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 the old
people
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 spend their
leisure
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 in browsing their interests on the internet with the help of
smartphones
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. In
this
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 way,
people
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 can entertain themselves from the comfort of their homes as
this
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 digital gadget can take
people
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 anywhere in the world. The rapidly increasing use of
smartphones
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 in contemporary society can be seen as a positive development because they allow
people
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 to keep in touch with their families and friends, and improve reading abilities. With regards to the former, as
this
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 is the age of globalization, many
people
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 work or study abroad. They often feel home-sick and lonely but they can relax by talking to relatives and companions. Another substantial advantage of using
smartphones
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 for
leisure
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 is developing a habit of reading because many
people
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 read online novels and e-books to enjoy their free
time
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.
This
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 enhances knowledge as well as an understanding of different global issues.
Hence
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, the use of
smartphones
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 has proven highly productive for users. In conclusion, communication and fun are the main reasons to use cell
phones
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 in
leisure
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time
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.
Therefore
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, I believe that they have a positive influence on
people
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 because many
people
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 spend their free
time
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 interacting with their relations and improving their reading abilities.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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