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Band 6

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#phones #internet #people #development
In modern times, cutting-edge
technology
 has become a pivotal part of
people
's life.
People
 can remain connected through cell phones and the internet. Many folks think it is a good way for engaging with each other whereas others opine that it has a bad impact on society. In
this
 essay, I will highlight my opinion. On the one hand, there is no doubt that state-of-art
technology
 contributes to progress for society.
In addition
, it gives a way to connect with each other and diminish the distance among
people
.
For instance
, modern apps and software
such
 as skype, zoom meeting, WhatsApp, Facebook etc are widely used for connecting with friends, relatives.
Besides
,
People
 has started to become active on social media
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and get to know each other which is good for their social connection.
On the other hand
, there is
also
 a drawback to
this
 modern
technology
. Some
people
 think that
people
 are becoming gravely addicted to the smartphones and internet, and forgetting the real values of society. To illustrate, some
people
 convey their best wishes to friends and love ones through social media rather than visiting their homes. In conclusion, modern
technology
 gives a good way to connect with
people
 but it
also
 affects human behaviour.
Submitted by akhil.parashar1985 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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