Compared to the past, more younger adults take medications for degenerative diseases. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer Nowadays, a larger number of younger adults take medicine to overcome degenerative diseases.There are some reasons why this is happening and tangible examples can prove these reasons.

The problem of degenerative diseases has been debated a lot recently. The number of young people having serious health conditions increased dramatically compared to previous ages. The following essay will discuss the possible evolution of
such
issues and give some examples that can support my arguments. The past decades have seen dramatic changes in the health care sector, improvements that our parents and grandparents could only have dreamed of. Unfortunately, not all developments have been able to cure all the diseases that have been caused by different reasons.
Firstly
, I strongly feel that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
globalization might have affected youth lifestyle by introducing international food chains, which contain high levels of sugar, calories, as well as industrial
flavors
Change the spelling
flavours
show examples
that might severely impact our health, these types of meals are affordable
also
well marketed, which promotes the high consumption. Another reason might be awareness, new generations tend to spend a huge amount of time playing online games, and
this
lifestyle replaces other healthier habits like gym and meditation.
Consequently
, our mind gets affected and
this
leads to dangerous repercussions on the body,
as a result
, develop incurable illnesses,
for instance
: Parkinson's, diabetes, obesity…
In addition
to that, pollution might be another reason causing damage to our lives. Personally speaking, I live in a hot country where
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
conditioner needs to be turned on all day. I definitely believe that the usage of these machines, as well as the
fridge
Add the comma(s)
,fridge
show examples
is quite harmful as they do emit unhealthy carbon monoxide, which weakens our immune system. To sum up, the globe has made great progress;
this
may well be a better time to live.
However
, I would suggest that youth should be made aware in order to adopt an early prevention mindset.
Submitted by elzein.houssam on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: