‘Everybody should donate a fixed amount of their income to support charity.’ How far do you share this viewpoint?

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It is believed that all
people
Use synonyms
should give a certain
percent
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percentage
show examples
of their revenue to humanitarian organizations. It seems to me that donating money to those who need
in
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apply
show examples
help can be one way to solve social concerns which are related to
health
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and
education
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. I will explain how
donations
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affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society positively.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the charity campaign tends to collect money from
people
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to solve
health
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problems among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children. Because it is difficult to cover some medical treatment
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
such
Linking Words
as cancer, liver and heart surgery
as
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apply
show examples
for
low income
Add a hyphen
low-income
show examples
people
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especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
in developing countries. There is a prime example that one
health
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project named ‘Heart never forgets’ is funded by individuals and companies’ donation has saved
over
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apply
show examples
thousands of children’s lives
last
Linking Words
year.
Secondly
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,
people
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’s
donations
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give a chance to the students who
from
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are from
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less affluent
family getting
Wrong verb form
families to get
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a higher
education
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.
This
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means that many young
people
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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cannot study at
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
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top universities
cause
Correct your spelling
because
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from
Change preposition
of
show examples
high tuition
fee
Fix the agreement mistake
fees
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however
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they have a true passion. So thanks to scholarships donated by warm-hearted
people
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, thousands of offspring can get a qualified
education
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all around the world.
On the other hand
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, I appreciate that some
people
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think differently, saying that the majority of
donations
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may not
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
to reach the targeted segment. Despite
this
Linking Words
, it seems that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
donation brings
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
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attitude in society
than
Rephrase
rather than
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not giving.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
donations
Use synonyms
can be a solution to solve some social problems
such
Linking Words
as
health
Use synonyms
and
education
Use synonyms
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
. If everybody
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
a philanthropist, our world would become more
contentedly
Replace the word
contented
show examples
.
Submitted by alexstudyin on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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