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Writing Samples /
Band 2

People should look after their health because this is a duty to the society not just a personal benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #health #duty #society
There is a statement that
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
 should
Add a missing verb
be responsibility
show examples
responsibility
Replace the word
responsible
show examples
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their well-being,
cause
Wrong verb form
causing
show examples
community
Add an article
the community
a community
show examples
 to have
responsibility
 for association. I completely disagree with that point of view because all
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 have to choose to
concern
Add a missing verb
be concern
show examples
 about their
health
 or not. And there is not any
responsibility
 to care about their
health
 or not.
First
 of all, I will start from that all people are growing in different
conditions
. And these
conditions
 are deciding what opinion they will have about society. If these
conditions
 could be very harmful to their mental
health
 or could be very beneficial to their
health
. These
conditions
 depend on many factors
such
 as how your parents have grown or have got any issues with your friends. As I said before if these
conditions
 will be very bad your opinion about society will be very bad.
Therefore
 you would think that you should not care about your
health
 not cause you to have a
responsibility
 to society. For ,example if Parents are saying that
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • duty
  • well-being
  • burden
  • healthcare systems
  • productive
  • economy
  • example
  • empower
  • informed choices
What to do next:
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