IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

It is observed that in economic progressive countries the longevity of life has increased. Throughout
this
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 essay, I will explore the problems that will be faced by
people
Use synonyms
 and communities due to
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
 in the life span of individuals and suggest possible solutions for the same.
To begin
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 with, an ageing population can put considerable pressure on the job sector, as
people
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 are not capable of working after a certain
age
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, creating a deficit in the number of employable
people
Use synonyms
 in the market.
For instance
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, Japan has a high proportion of aged
people
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, due to which the employment sector is impacted as there is a lack of skilled workers.
Furthermore
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, the government expenditure in healthcare
also
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 increases for
people
Use synonyms
 of a higher
age
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 bracket, since they are prone to
Use synonyms
age related
Add a hyphen
age-related
show examples
 physical ailments.
Moreover
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, public institutions cannot tax them, as they are not regular wage earners and liable to be paid a certain pension in specific countries,
further
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 increasing government
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
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. A possible solution could be public bodies having special training programs for older
people
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, in order to keep them updated with the latest work trends and technology, enabling them to be employed by organisations .
For example
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, in India, specific vocational training is given to
people
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 above the
age
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 of 65 in the telecommunication sector, to increase their chances of being hired.
Moreover
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, for
reduction
Add an article
a reduction
the reduction
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 in government expenditure on Healthcare facilities, regular health checkups can be administered at frequent intervals of time for a subsidised fee to ensure that they do not have any major disease which warrants a visit to the hospital or detailed surgery. In conclusion, aged
people
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 can have a detrimental effect on the economy of a country but at the same time if proper measures are taken by the prevalent authorities
then
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 they will not be a burden to any community.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
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