Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#people #government #rise #obesity #children

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Many individuals advocate that with the upsurge of globalization, the ministry is the lead cause behind the rapid influx in childhood obesity. From my standpoint, I believe that the government is accountable for

this

Linking Words

negative phenomenon, which will be elaborated with applicable instances. Westernization has opened a plethora of opportunities for both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

developed and developing nations. From introducing famous fast food joints and stylised trends to various employment offers.

However

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this

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comes at a price. Several restaurants are making younglings and adults overweight - which is driving them vulnerable to innumerable

health related

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health-related

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issues including diabetes, cardiovascular diseases and osteoarthritis. A study conducted by WHO (World Health Organization) in 2016, stated that the US and China had a high estimate of Obesity amongst the youth aged 6- 14 years by exactly 75 million and 84 million, respectively. Whereas, the remaining countries' results varied to approximately 40 - 49 million. The food and beverages organisations, advertising their delectable yet harmful products lure kids to purchase them.

For example

Linking Words

, in India, the famous

fast food

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fast-food

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chain - Mcdonalds, is known to sell their "Happy Meals' ' for just Rs. 20 INR. The affordable prices attract a larger target audience, which enhances the economy of the organisation making it a booming success.

Instead

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of a

nutrient enriched

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nutrient-enriched

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diet, young people turn to meals with excessive carbohydrates.

Furthermore

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, ever since the pandemic strike,

introduction

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the introduction

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of work from home is considered to be another major factor contributing to

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deadly condition. Jobs have remote roles, schools are shifted to online platforms and shopping has been digitized. All these tasks require minimal movement, meaning everything can be done from one place without stepping out of one's comfort zone. Online Education, which consists of assignment completion and teaching via video calling applications, is one of the reasons for children's increasing body mass. Earlier, when these academic institutions were open, the student's physical presence and allotted breaks helped them get the required cardio working that their bodies needed. In a recent experiment, conducted by NFHS - National Family Health Survey Delhi - it was observed that almost 40% of the individuals come under the category of overweight, during the ongoing lockdown period. The young crowd has become lethargic and are exhausted if they slightly work out. To summarise, though the country's parliament is the main culprit behind

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hazardous situation amongst the younger population, suitable actions are being implemented. Global awareness pertaining to

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issue can have profitable gains for both the nation and its upcoming generation.

Submitted by srishtisirohi98 on Fri Mar 18 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

420 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

policies
responsibility
health and well-being
education and awareness programs
childhood obesity
food advertising and labeling
unhealthy food
supportive environments
recreational facilities
collaboration
healthcare providers

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Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

It is the job of governments and companies to deal with the huge environmental problems which we face. Individuals on their own can do little or nothing’. What is your opinion about this statement?

Advances in science and technology and other areas of society in the last 100 years have transformed the way we live as postponing the day we die. There is no better time to be alive than now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.