IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. It is inevitable that traditional cultures will be lost as technology develops. Technology and traditional cultures are incompatible. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #cultures #technology
Due to the development of technology, some people are concerned that traditional
culture
 will be disappeared. Regarding
this
, I strongly agree with
this
 assertion, and there are certain reasons.
Firstly
, because of the development of telecommunication skills
that is
 enhanced by technology
such
 as the Internet and various electronic devices
such
 as laptops and mobile phones, super nations' languages tend to easily reach minor nations through the media.
Therefore
, strong
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
 words dominate weak
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
 words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 one part of the
culture
.
For example
, recent media in Korea reports that one minor language is
losing
Wrong verb form
lost
show examples
 once in two weeks in contemporary society. As the example clearly illustrates,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
only a few languages will be survived in the future. What is more, minor countries will be lost
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 words that represent their cultures.
Secondly
, as individuals increasingly pursue convenient and rational life, some neglect tradition. Since it is generally acknowledged that traditional
culture
 is costly and obsolete, young generations consider that tradition is unreasonable.
For instance
, a survey conducted by the Korea Wedding Foundation has revealed that almost 20% of young couples want to have
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 simple modern style wedding, rather than
traditional
Correct article usage
a traditional
show examples
 one because it is too expensive and unreasonable.
Therefore
, there is no doubt to point out that traditional
culture
 will be lost since people want to live a simple life
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 is affordable. In conclusion, due to telecommunication technology and youngsters who pursue s rational lifestyle, traditional
culture
 will be faded away in the future.
Submitted by hiasince38 on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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