You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion You should write at least 250 words.
Some sectors of society believe that governments should prohibit high-risk sports,
while
others disagree that people should do any sports as they are free to decide whatever is best for them. I believe that under controlled situations, sportspersons can perform any activity, even if it is dangerous for them, as long as they compromise other's integrity.
To begin
with, dangerous sports could be a potential hazard for others. This
is because there are many records throughout the history of many incidents caused by sportsperson's mistakes or failures in the event organisation. For instance
, the Formula 1 car exploded against a fence after a massive crash in the race. hurting dozens of spectators. That is
why these sectors of society believe that the government should ban this
kind of sport, which has a clear point of protecting people.
On the other hand
, we can't stop making someone do what they really love. I believe each person has the right choice before doing this
kind of sport. They can put themselves in danger because of their happiness when doing what they want. For example
, in the same case of the Formula 1 race, not letting all these drivers do what they probably most enjoy in their lives just because it is appropriate for several groups. In this
situation, it does not seem right to interfere with other's will, a fair reason to also
support this
thought.
In conclusion, although
the government just want to protect civilians from the risk of witnessing these kings of spectacular events, sportspersons make their own decisions because they know themselves best and that is
why the government must regulate the organisation of the events and guarantee the safety of spectators and sportspeople.Submitted by baonhi260804 on
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that your essay maintains a clear and logical structure throughout. Your essay generally does so, but refining the connection between paragraphs could further enhance readability and flow.
Coherence & Cohesion
Incorporate a variety of cohesive devices effectively but avoid overuse or incorrect use, which can detract from the clarity of your argument. Use synonyms and paraphrasing to avoid repetition.
Task Achievement
Address all parts of the prompt in your response. You've done a good job discussing both views and giving your own opinion. Expanding on your own viewpoint with more detailed explanations or examples could make your position even stronger.
Task Achievement
Integrate a wider range of relevant, specific examples to support your points. This enriches your essay and makes your arguments more convincing. While your examples are pertinent, additional or more detailed examples could amplify your essay's effectiveness.