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Band 6

Government should make people responsible for looking after their own local environment. Do you agree or disagree?

#government #people #environment
Some
people
argument
Replace the word
argue
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 that authorities need
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
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 citizens
Add an article
the responsibility
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responsibility
Replace the word
responsible
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 for taking after their own local
environment
. I totally agree about
this
 problem above.
First
 of all, it is necessary for each citizen to have the responsibility to protect the
environment
 because the
government
 cannot have enough time and conditions to handle all environmental problems in each locality. The
government
's time is mostly invested in policies to promote national development in all fields
such
 as economy, politics, education and culture.
For example
, when
people
 organize their own environmental protection activities
such
 as planting trees, picking up trash
the
Change preposition
on the
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 coast and so on, the authority has found a way to improve the country's development.
Therefore
, not only the
government
 but
also
 the
people
 need to be responsible for protecting the
environment
. Environmental
pollution
also
 indirectly affects
people
's health, so each resident plays an important role in protecting the surrounding living
environment
. Society is a common
environment
 for thousands of
people
, so when
people
 have a sense of voluntary protection of the
environment
, it
also
 means that they protect their own lives.
For example
, when
people
 don't care about the surrounding living
environment
, what is the cause of
pollution
 in many sources of the same level
such
 as water
pollution
, air
pollution
, atmospheric
pollution
 and so on.
This
 will directly affect
people
's healthy milk, forming diseases of the respiratory tract, cardiovascular system. I completely agree with the view that the
people
 and the
government
 together protect the
environment
 and balance the ecosystem because
this
 is an urgent issue for
people
in particular
 and nature in general. Let's join hands to build a clean and beautiful green world.
Submitted by domaianh.uliser on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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