IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. ​ To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#universities #numbers #students
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There are many different
subjects
Use synonyms
 in university and some of them may require special talent or physical ability, but is
this
Linking Words
 a good reason to not
allowing for
Wrong verb form
allow
show examples
 everyone to study their interests? In my view, some
subjects
Use synonyms
 at university need physical abilities and everyone cannot manage to study
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
 , military education usually require more male than female and it feels right because
this
Linking Words
 kind of
tasks
Fix the agreement mistake
task
show examples
 requires menUse synonyms
Change preposition
for
show examples
armed forces army contingent crew delegation gang military party servicemen squad team unit It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will
show
Use synonyms
 the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
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On the other hand
Linking Words
 , most females are good at article and paintWrong verb form painting It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb paint. Consider changing it.
show
Use synonyms
examples
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 and often they cook better than males.
Therefore
Linking Words
 , dividing
subjects
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 for specific sex can be a good idea but after all , we should not force anybody to do what we think
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
apply
Correct subject-verb agreement
applies
show examples
It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.
show
Use synonyms
examples
Use synonyms
 is best for them and we must give them a choice . I subscribe to the notion that everybody should have an equal chance to decide what to study regardless of their
gender
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 . We saw many men and
women
Use synonyms
 during history
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 did many great tasks despite their disability and
gender
Use synonyms
 . I believe, forcing people to do what they do not like and not allowing them to follow their interests can have a bad Replace the word effect The word
affect
Replace the word
effect
show examples
 may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.
show
Use synonyms
examples
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of
show examples
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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on both their own lives and their societies. I uphold the view that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 people's interests have nothing to do with their
gender
Use synonyms
 .
For example
Linking Words
 ,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
numerous
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 I saw men that have an interest in
women
Use synonyms
's tasks
suck
Correct your spelling
such
show examples
 as cooking and
also
Linking Words
women
Use synonyms
 who had an interest in housebuilding.
Therefore
Linking Words
 , we should not look at people's
gender
Use synonyms
 , we should look for talent. In conclusion, from my Correct
your
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
spelling perspective The word
prospective
Correct your spelling
perspective
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 doesn’t seem to fit
this
Linking Words
 context. Consider replacing it with a different one.
show
Use synonyms
examples
Use synonyms
 perspective , there is no difference between
women
Use synonyms
 and men and regardless the
gender
Use synonyms
 they can do anything that they want.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, maybe there are a few
subjects
Use synonyms
 that we should put more filters on
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and
that is
Linking Words
 all.
Submitted by Aminsedgi on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender diversity
  • fostering innovation
  • educational experience
  • enforcing gender quotas
  • merit and potential
  • individual achievements
  • natural differences
  • gender equality
  • reducing gender stereotypes
  • balanced workforce
  • traditionally male-dominated or female-dominated fields
  • fluctuating applicant numbers
  • compromise on quality
  • diversity aspects
What to do next:
Look at other essays: