A person's worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Nowadays, some
people
believe that
judge
Replace the word
judging
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
person
based
Add a missing verb
is based
show examples
upon
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
status
and materialistic possessions. There is
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
much importance given to traditional values
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
kindness, honour or trust. I absolutely oppose
this
trend and do not agree. It is should be the criteria to judge someone's worth and
this
essay attempts to discuss the same. Respect is shared upon the social
status
someone beholds which is, in
turn
Add the comma(s)
,turn
show examples
dependent upon the type of job or the designation of the
person
in the company. It increases the net worth of a
status
as he/she can afford more expensive goods according to many. Neighbours consider them worthy to be living near their house only if they have a strong financial position.
For instance
, sharing my personal experience, some of the
people
living near my house only interacted with me once they got to know that I have a job.
Hence
,
this
proves that money is more important in the eyes of
people
. Honesty or kindness is the attribute present in the nature of
person
Add an article
the person
a person
show examples
. Earlier,
people
used to respect
such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
individuals who possessed
such
features. Even today, some
people
like to have
such
kind of persons living near them as they can rely on their help and can share their personal problems as well.
For example
, if there is some issue related to health or finance, one can connect with those
people
to get some advice.
However
, there is a very small proportion of the population who adores
people
with these qualities. To conclude, the points don’t sum up that
person
's worth is judged upon the societal
status
and expensive, exotic items one possess. There is not much heed given to old fashioned values and I totally disagree with it.
Submitted by nadita.ayudya on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social status
  • material possessions
  • old-fashioned values
  • honour
  • kindness
  • trust
  • empathy
  • media influence
  • self-worth
  • metrics of success
  • financial achievements
  • community contributions
  • superficial connections
  • emotional bonds
  • life satisfaction
  • stress and anxiety
  • policy changes
  • community programs
  • restoring balance
  • personal character
What to do next:
Look at other essays: