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Band 6

Many childhood diseases can now be prevented through the use of vaccines. Should parents be made by law to immunise their children against common diseases or should individuals have the right to choose not to immunise their children?

#childhood #diseases #vaccines #parents #law #immunise #children #individuals #right
Early childhood diseases
is
Change the verb form
are
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 the major
causes
Fix the agreement mistake
cause
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 of death globally. Meanwhile, new discoveries
of
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in
show examples
 vaccines
is
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are
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 essential to humankind.
Mortality
Correct article usage
The mortality
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 rate could be diminished once
vaccination
Correct article usage
the vaccination
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 law is abided by the public
however
 some
parents
 are against
with
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apply
show examples
it. On the
first
 hand, following the scheduled immunisation chart is imperative
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
children for
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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to maintain the optimum health level in
such
 a way they will not be easily contracted
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
different bacteria and viruses.
For instance
, following the implemented rules of government to bring the child
in
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to
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vaccination
Correct article usage
a vaccination
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center
Change the spelling
centre
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.
Parents
 must adhere to the policy since it will give their child the necessary maximum protection.
Thus
, it will be good for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humanity since everyone were vaccinated and it will decrease the number of early childhood death.
On the other hand
, some
parents
 preferred not to immunise their
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
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 because of the side effects that they have had observed in vaccinated
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
.
For example
, polio
vaccination
 in the Philippines has bad effects
to
Change preposition
on
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 others like they became crippled. Few suffered entirely by utilizing crutches and others became totally futile.
Consequently
, guardians tend to follow their human instinct not to receive any form of
vaccines
Fix the agreement mistake
vaccine
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.
However
,
some
Change preposition
in some
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 parts
in
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of
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 Africa
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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could not receive
Add an article
the vaccine
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vaccine
Fix the agreement mistake
vaccines
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 even though
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
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 wanted to due to the fact that
government
Correct article usage
the government
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vaccination
 fund is not enough. Children are extremely malnourished and early
faces
Fix the agreement mistake
face
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 their
death bed
Correct your spelling
deathbed
show examples
. In the long run, the youth will immensely suffer the consequences of not
vaccinated
Add a missing verb
being vaccinated
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. In summary,
vaccination
 is crucial to
stabilized
Wrong verb form
stabilise
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 childrens' immunity
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to the drawbacks it may bring to the body. At the end of the day,
parents
has
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have
show examples
 the freedom to choose the best for their children
either
Correct word choice
whether
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 to get vaccinated or not.
Submitted by maymosqueda on

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