IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Creative artists should always have the freedom to express their ideas in any way they wish. The government should not restrict what they do. To what extent do you agree with this opinion.

#artists #freedom #government
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Over the
last
 few years , it has become an increasingly worrying issue through the fact that
artists
 have no freedom to do whatever they want and the government may restrict them not doing certain activities .the best way is for the government to allow them to have a voice by doing different kinds of arts . I am strongly in favour of
this
 notion and in
this
 essay, I will support my idea with examples and propose a conclusion.
First
 and foremost , art is a unique language by which
artists
 are able to transfer an idea or a problem to the public . Take painters as an example, he or they can get inspiration through
people
 , random occurrences or themselves and use their initiatives and creativity to create something which might be beyond the imagination and inspire a wide variety of
people
 .
Furthermore
, by doing that a majority of
people
 can be aware of certain things . What's more, it can bring diverse cultures together and promote cohesion among societies .
For instance
 , a professional director can make a movie about a culture that was considered to be meaningless and portray all the positive aspects of it in order to raise
people
's awareness about it and convince them to accept it how it is . Turning to the other side of the spectrum , we should take into account that some arts promote aggression and develop a sense of isolation especially, for children .
For example
 , some
artists
 try to use their position and promote violence in society.In
this
 case, the government should tackle the issue by imposing strict laws so as to these laws act as a deterrent against chaos . All things considered ,
Although
 sometimes some
artists
 can affect the nation , I strongly believe the existence of
artists
 brought about a revolution in our lives and make our world so much better and more vibrant .
Submitted by mousavimina93 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: