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Band 6

Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarket in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#development #expansion #supermarket #countries #business #people #closure #death #communities
It is a common belief that rapid
expansion
 of
supermarket
Fix the agreement mistake
supermarkets
show examples
 in some countries, many small, local
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
 are able to compete and local
business
 will bring about the
develop
Replace the word
development
show examples
 of local communities.
However
, I firmly believe that
this
expansion
 brings threats
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 local
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
Correct your spelling
instead
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in stead
Correct your spelling
instead
show examples
 of chances.
To begin
 with,
supermarket
expansion
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
 more choices for local consumers, which means local
business
 have more competitor.
Supermarket
usually
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are usually
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 built in a large area
with
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a huge scale and consumer benefits a lot from it. They have more
choice
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choices
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 from all over the world with import
products
 or high-end brands that
never
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have never
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appear
Wrong verb form
appeared
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 before. And local brands
also
 have more
competitor
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competitors
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, which
are have
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has
show examples
 a huge
of
Change preposition
apply
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investment from rich people all over the country. Making small
business
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businesses
show examples
 are downsizing their scale to
operates
Wrong verb form
operate
show examples
 efficiently. According to a recent survey in
Donghoi
Correct your spelling
Donghai
, a small city in Vietnam, the appearance of a huge mall
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
makes the revenues of traditional
market
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markets
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 and
business
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businesses
show examples
decreased
Wrong verb form
decrease
show examples
 up to 15
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Clearly that if
small
Add an article
a small
the small
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business
 does not do anything, they can
be disappear
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disappear
show examples
 in the future. On top of that,
consumer
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consumers
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 have a tendency to
using
Wrong verb form
use
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products
 from
big
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the big
a big
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company
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companies
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 rather than small
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
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. Since the
third
 industrial revolution,
products
 are being
shiped
Correct your spelling
shipped
 from all around the world.
In addition
, globalization makes individuals generally want to buy
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
international
products
 or even
products
 that
made
Add a missing verb
are made
show examples
 by giant
exclusively
Change the adverb
exclusive
show examples
 company.
For instance
, Laotian are usually attended by import
products
. They worship it and the result
are
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is
show examples
 their local or small company decline
revenues
Change preposition
in revenues
show examples
 significantly.
This
a
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
popular example
about
Change preposition
of
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 the fame of big
coperations
Correct your spelling
corporations
. To sum up,
supermarket
expansion
providing
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
 more choices for
consumer
Add an article
the consumer
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 and their fame
also
catching
Wrong verb form
catches
show examples
customers
Change noun form
customers'
customer's
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 attention. For these reasons, it is clear that the
expansion
 of
supermarket
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supermarkets
show examples
 brings the death of
local
Add an article
a local
the local
show examples
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
.
Submitted by nguyenanhngocphan on

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