Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

#television #free-time #people

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

this

Linking Words

contemporary world,

Remove the article

apply

show examples

television has become

the

Correct article usage

show examples

great mean of entertainment in the life of everyone. It can make people inactive and refrain them from being social. I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

notion and in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss my reasons for the same. On the

first

Linking Words

hand, the availability of plenty of channels for various

jonre

Correct your spelling

jobs

can attract anyone to watch it for

longer

Add an article

a longer

show examples

duration. Because of

constant

Add an article

a constant

show examples

source of entertainment, the person watching it

reamins

Correct your spelling

remains

at home sitting ideal and enjoy their time.

For instance

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every Sunday, broadcasters

brodcasts

Correct your spelling

broadcasts

broadcast

the latest movies and many prefer to watch them back-to-back.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

way they are not only being lazy but

also

Linking Words

getting isolated from their friends and family.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, with the help of news channels, a person can remain connected with the world. By watching

latest

Correct article usage

the latest

show examples

current news, humans get to know what is happening

arround

Correct your spelling

around

them and they try to be a part of any event

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if needed.

For example

Linking Words

, during the latest pandemic Covid-19, many social workers were getting

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

updated information about

availability

Add an article

the availability

show examples

of beds and oxygen cylinders in hospitals from local news broadcasters which aided them

guiding

Change preposition

in guiding

show examples

patients

accordingly

Linking Words

Thus

Linking Words

, with the help of

media

Add a comma

,media

show examples

they contributed efficiently to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. To conclude,

Remove the article

apply

show examples

television is the best way to enjoy the free-time;

however

Linking Words

, uncontrolled usage of it can make people unfit and disconnect them from the social network. I think with the controlled use of it, one can enjoy their life and

also

Linking Words

get the desired knowledge of surroundings.

Submitted by hvyas on Fri Apr 01 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs ( for example, working for charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to the younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Many think secondary school students should give back to the public by rendering mandatory services. I disagree with that because, even though, partaking in these tasks is good. It can however, be exhausting, time consuming and also have a negative impact on their academic performance .
6.5
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually empahise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?
These days, many businesses advertise products that are marketed as brand new. This is due to the market being increasingly more competitive and this should be seen as a negative development because it can deceive customers in some way.
7
band
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweight the disadvantages?
It is true that nowadays, in some parts of the world, the number of youngsters is much more than that elderlies. Despite that this situation has both advantages and drawbacks, I believe its benefits are more significant and the negative sides are negligible.
7
band
Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. [545]
Nowadays some people believe that the problem regarding the extinction of trees and animals is most distinguished, whereas others contradict that opinion and suggest that the main issues are global warming, air pollution and climate change. In my opinion, environmental problems are the most important.
6.5
band
Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and wether they are married or single some people say that this information may be relavant and useful.Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your openion.
Some people argue that recruiters should ask candidates for their personal information during the interview, such as hobbies, interests, and marriage status, because they believe that this informationinformation will add more information about their assessment of the candidates, while others disagree. This essay will discuss both perspectives before giving my personal opinion.

Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

Unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs ( for example, working for charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sports to the younger children) To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually empahise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is positive or negative development?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweight the disadvantages?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. [545]

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and wether they are married or single some people say that this information may be relavant and useful.Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your openion.