Some people think that mental health is the most important factor for success in sports. However, some others believe that it is more important to have strong and fit people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Success in sports depends on various factors
such
Linking Words
as physical
fitness
Use synonyms
and mental well-being.
However
Linking Words
, some people argue that mental
health
Use synonyms
has a great influence on an athlete's success,
while
Linking Words
others believe that physical
fitness
Use synonyms
is
priority
Add an article
a priority
show examples
in games. I believe that a successful athlete needs
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
coordination between
both
Use synonyms
factors. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will discuss
both
Use synonyms
viewpoints and give my opinion. On the one hand, a considerable number of people advocate that mental
health
Use synonyms
and psychological readiness are crucial for success in sports. It not only helps individuals to handle situations more effectively and efficiently, but it
also
Linking Words
helps them to boost their confidence.
For instance
Linking Words
, famous tennis player Sania Mirza always discussed in her interviews how working on her psychological
health
Use synonyms
helped her to beat depression and enhance her performance in her career.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, better mental well-being helps sportspersons to focus more on their game, which leads to better performance.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, an equally large group believes that sportspersons should have strong and fit physical capabilities. A well-conditioned body with strength and endurance is key to competing at a high level. Most games require a certain level of physical
fitness
Use synonyms
to participate; if athletes do not reach that level, they are not allowed to participate in competitions.
For example
Linking Words
, a famous wrestler, "Vignesh Phogat" from India, was terminated from the Paris Olympics,
2024
Change preposition
in 2024
show examples
, because she did not meet the requirements for physical
fitness
Use synonyms
in the game. I believe that mental and physical
health
Use synonyms
are
both
Use synonyms
important aspects of an athlete's career. Mental
health
Use synonyms
helps to control burnout and the emotions of players,
whereas
Linking Words
physical
fitness
Use synonyms
helps them to tackle their challenges.
To conclude
Linking Words
, players can become successful in their careers if they achieve a balance between
both
Use synonyms
, with better strategies and training.
Submitted by maangaganpreet51 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Consider strengthening the introduction by explicitly stating your thesis. This will provide a clear roadmap of your opinion from the start.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion could summarize the key points discussed more concisely. Ensure the conclusion explicitly reflects the entire argument.
task response
Try to expand on the analysis of the examples provided, explaining how they directly support your argument in more depth.
task response
You've presented a clear understanding of both viewpoints, which contributes well to a balanced discussion.
task response
Linking examples, like Sania Mirza, to the main argument helps effectively in illustrating your points.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph flows logically into the next, showing effective use of cohesive devices.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Mental resilience
  • Psychological readiness
  • Confidence
  • Focus
  • Physical capabilities
  • Agility
  • Endurance
  • Mental toughness
  • Sports psychologists
  • Mental preparedness
  • Burnout
  • Strategic thinking
What to do next:
Look at other essays: