Over time, as children grow older, the relationship they have with their parents changes. In your opinion, what role should parents have in their adult children’s lives?

That is
true that
children
and
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
bond
Fix the agreement mistake
bonds
show examples
are extremely tight since
parents
are those who gave the opportunity for their
kids
to be born.
However
, as
children
getting
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
older their relationship with their
parents
also
become altered. The reason is that as people become mature and able to earn their own money they become independent from those who are their
mother
Fix the agreement mistake
mothers
show examples
and father.
This
essay will discuss which part should
parents
play in
life
Add an article
the life
show examples
of adult
children
.
Firstly
,
parents
are great teachers because of their long term experience and age.
This
is because they have faced diverse circumstances and
life
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
so that they could furtherly support their
children
with their
Correct your spelling
advice
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
and
life
tips. To illustrate , my aunt is always consulting her daughter with
Correct your spelling
advice
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
when it comes
which
Change preposition
to which
show examples
medicine to purchase for her
children
or to which hospital to take her
kids
.
Moreover
,
parents
can take care of their grandchildren when their
parents
at
Add a missing verb
are at
show examples
work or going out
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
somewhere.
For instance
, my colleague is always leaving her daughters with her
parents
in law so that she can
freedomly
Correct your spelling
freedom
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
hang out with us and relax.
Thus
,
parents
are essential in grown
children '
Change noun form
children's
show examples
life
as they can support them with
life
Correct your spelling
advice
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
and
taking
Wrong verb form
take
show examples
care of their
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
.
Seocindly
Correct your spelling
Secondly
,
parents
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
so crucial in everyone's
life
even if he or she is already mature and old. So having
parents
is so vital because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
just having them
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
anyone happier and content with their lives.
This
is because as
Kazakh
Correct article usage
the Kazakh
show examples
proverb says: the kid without
father
Correct article usage
a father
show examples
is half
orphan
Correct article usage
an orphan
show examples
,
without
Correct word choice
and without
show examples
mother
Correct article usage
a mother
show examples
is
completely
Correct article usage
a completely
show examples
orphan
Correct article usage
an orphan
show examples
. To illustrate , when
Add a hyphen
grown-up
show examples
grown
Add an article
a grown
the grown
show examples
up boy or girl is getting married ,
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
role in their weddings
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
so important because they are reorientation of his family's prosperity and relationship.
This
would lead to
have
Change the verb form
having
show examples
good connections with
bride's
Correct article usage
the bride's
show examples
parents
as they in the future will socialise and meet up in crucial events. So,
parents
can play in adults
life
as even
old
Correct article usage
an old
show examples
person
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to have live
parents
to feed himself not to parentless. To conclude,
parents 's
Remove the s
parents'
show examples
role
Add a missing verb
is
show examples
important not only in
kids
but
also
Add a hyphen
grown-up
show examples
grown
Change preposition
in grown
show examples
up
children
because
parents
are those who have a
life
and raised their sons and daughters. Even
the
Correct word choice
if the
show examples
individual is grown up ,
parent's
Correct article usage
the parent's
show examples
role is irreplaceable and essential since they can be supportive
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
providing
Correct your spelling
advice
advices
Change the wording
advice
pieces of advice
bits of advice
show examples
and taking care of their
kids
.
Moreover
, old people need to have their
parents
besides
Change preposition
apply
show examples
because of being felt that they are in
full
Add an article
the full
a full
show examples
family and not alone .
This
would
further
my
Change the pronoun
me
show examples
support
them
Change preposition
for them
show examples
in future family events.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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