IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that technologies such as mobile phones are disrupting social interaction.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #technologies #phones #interaction
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There exist various opinions regarding modern technologies. A huge part of individuals
claim
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claims
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 that some types of techniques,
such
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 as cell phones have an imperfect impact on
people
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's communication skills. I am inclined to believe that
this
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 is partially true.
This
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 tendency can influence the different social communication of human beings, depending on the purpose of its use. On the one hand,
this
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 can be the case, when
people
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 find it an option for entertainment. In general, there are huge amounts of online activities, available especially on mobile devices,
such
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 as games and social sites, which are addictive and
people
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 binge on there for long hours.
Consequently
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, after some
time
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 they not only cannot get in touch with others and avoid face-to-face meetings, because of becoming self-contained but
also
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 have no
time
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, as waste their whole
time
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 on their phones. A friend of mine,
for instance
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, could not find any relevant job for himself, since he is a digital native and does not possess a white-and-black rule among staff members.
On the other hand
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,
this
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 development works
wonder
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wonders
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 for the global communication of society, when they use it mainly for human contact. In essence,
people
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 are responsible for a variety of duties, which must be done in some period of
time
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that is
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 because they need some supportive issues, provided it helps them to get rid of
time
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-consuming tasks.
Therefore
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, mobile devices are considered the ideal option, as due to
this
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 it becomes available to get in contact with surroundings for several objectives, combining it with job responsibilities. According to the article of Steve Jobs in 2005,
people
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 could broaden the circle of their friends and colleagues many times, after appearing ‘’Apple” iPhone, which was ahead of its
time
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. To recapitulate, using mobiles is a double-edged sword for social interaction. Undoubtedly
this
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 trend can be both beneficial and harmful for
people
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, based on the way they deal it with.
Thus
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, the members of society can avoid possible poor results for their association with others, provided it will be the measure for contacting,
otherwise
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,they will have problems at
this
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 task.
Submitted by mamyan91 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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