IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has negative impact on the countries travelled to, To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #travel #countries #pleasure #believe #impact
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Travelling around the world become
widespread
Add an article
a widespread
show examples
 hobby. It widens horizons, enriches life
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
 and makes good memories. There are people, who consider that
tourists
Use synonyms
 affect negatively to countries, where they came to.
However
Linking Words
, I am largely in agreement with the fact that
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 bring benefits rather than having
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 impact.
First
Linking Words
 of all,
high
Add an article
a high
the high
show examples
 wave of
tourists
Use synonyms
 positively
affect
Change the verb form
affects
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
countries
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 economy.
Tourists
Use synonyms
 tend to buy presents for their relatives while travelling.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
wave
Add an article
a wave
the wave
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
tourists
Add a comma
,tourists
show examples
 the number of places
such
Linking Words
 as
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
 or restaurant increase,
consequently
Linking Words
,
unemployment
Add an article
the unemployment
an unemployment
show examples
 rate of
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
 will witness
decrease
Correct article usage
a decrease
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, according to research conducted in 2013, in Turkey,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every summer, the employment rate
increased
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
 0.5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 related to the wave of
tourists
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, travelling around the world provides
exchange
Add an article
an exchange
the exchange
show examples
 of lifestyle, culture and food. Owing to it, people are on
this
Linking Words
 level of
growing
Replace the word
growth
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, globalization
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
 to the development of
cousin
Fix the agreement mistake
cousins
show examples
 in many countries.
However
Linking Words
, negative impacts are
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
no exception. Destruction of nature, pollution or propaganda can happen while there are
tourists
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, cultural shock may bring difficulties, misunderstanding and lead to bad relations between two nations. In conclusion, there can be moments, when
tourists
Use synonyms
 bring
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
show examples
 impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the nations they
travelled
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
 to, including pollution, destruction of nature, but considering
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
show examples
 impacts they have, in my opinion advantages outweigh them
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural exchanges
  • Global connections
  • Tourism boosts
  • Local economy
  • Over-tourism
  • Environmental degradation
  • Landmarks
  • Commodification of culture
  • Authentic cultural expressions
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Tourism infrastructure
  • Public services
  • Disrespect local customs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: