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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Instead of training a few athletes to win medals at the Olympics, governments should spend the money on programmes encouraging the public to be active and stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#athletes #medals #olympics #governments #money #programmes
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Nowadays, it is pivotal for the
government
 to properly handle and balance the infrastructure of the country.So, some individuals recommend that they should spend their finance on sports while others advocate that it should be equally funded in general activities like encouraging the public to be ardent and vigorous. In my perspective, I completely disagree with
this
 statement as I will support my notion with
further
 details. As the development of young beings is as essential as their education, the
government
 should not neglect the aspect of the sport that contributes to children's sake.
Consequently
,
this
 will
further
 nurture the sense of sport and potentially lead them to be professional athletes on their own. Another reason to help athletes is that if the authority actively contributes to
such
 programs,
this
 will highly impact their careers in a positive way.
For example
, the proper coaching of the experienced instructors and the resources to support the athletes can significantly improve their skills and ultimately allow them to increase the country's reputation.
However
,
on the other hand
, it is not necessarily ideal to use their finance just to seduce people to be enthusiastic and healthy. Even though
this
 is generally crucial, the
government
 can decently motivate them with regular campaigns.
Moreover
, they can
also
 provide public awareness competitions and for children, they can guide and instil the importance of health and involvement with certain education programs. In conclusion, both of the statements are vital in their aspect. But, as a citizen, I prefer those sports programs to support players rather than motivate the public to stay healthy. As for me, it is recommended that the
government
 handle them by adjusting the respective roles .
Submitted by Lily on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reallocate
  • mass health improvement
  • national health issues
  • foster a sense of community
  • boost morale
  • lifestyle
  • public health programs
  • government’s commitment
  • national pride
  • Olympic success
  • physical activity
  • discovery of new talents
  • elite athletes
  • balanced approach
  • physical and mental health benefits
  • inspiring national pride
  • unity
  • elite sports
  • innovation
  • sports science and technology
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