IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many foods are shipped from far away. Some people think that eating local food is more environmentally and economically. Do you think the advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

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It is true that
people
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 rely on more and more imported
food
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 products, and I completely agree that eating
food
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 produced by local farms is much better than consuming those from far away. There are a variety of reasons for
this
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, and I will discuss both advantages and disadvantages in
this
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 essay. There are some disadvantages if
people
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 must eating eat only local
food
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.
Firstly
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, if
people
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 are living in a small area which has almost no farming land, the citizens there might have no other choice than
eating
Change the verb form
to eat
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food
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 from other places.
For example
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, Japan which owns a small land but
a
Add a missing verb
has a
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large population is greatly dependent on importing
food
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 from other countries in order to satisfy the market's needs. In another case, if
people
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 are limited to
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
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 only
food
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 from the local and the local agriculture industry cannot produce every kind of
food
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 to fulfil the balanced nutrition requirement for health, it will impact the development of
people
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's growth
especially
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,especially
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 children's.
On the other hand
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, there are more advantages if
people
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 buy more local
food
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.
Firstly
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, it could reduce the transportation of imported
food
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 which reduces the impacts
on
Change preposition
of
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 climate
changes
Fix the agreement mistake
change
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 on the Earth and in the meantime
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
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 reduces the cost of transportation so
people
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 can save their cost of living by buying cheaper
food
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.
Secondly
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, since
local
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the local
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food
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 is faster to be delivered to the market, it is generally fresher than
food
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 with long-term transportation.
Finally
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, the local
food
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 can be better regulated by the local law which means the quality of the local
food
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 could be higher than the imported
one
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ones
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. In conclusion, I believe that the advantages of eating local
food
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 products outweigh its disadvantages because of reasons from both environmental wise and economic wise.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • transportation
  • environmentally friendly
  • economically beneficial
  • local farmers
  • local economy
  • fresher
  • nutritious
  • food security
  • imports
  • preserving
  • traditional farming practices
  • biodiversity
  • limited variety
  • availability
  • cost
  • contributor
What to do next:
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