Some people think that dangerous sports should be banned while others think people should be free to choose. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Human beings are debating whether dangerous

sports

should be prohibited or not. I would argue that extremely perilous competitive

sports

should not be forbidden. On the one hand, mankind considers that extreme games should be banned. Our health is our greatest asset, so

sports

that put it at risk should not be allowed. İn addition, it is selfish to risk one’s life for pleasure.

Furthermore

, sustaining a lifelong injury is too high a price to pay for a brief adrenaline rush.

Moreover

, people are not doing anything to make

sports

safer.

Lastly

, extreme

sports

can cause stress and other health problems.

On the other hand

, all

sports

are potentially unsafe, including some of the most popular ones.

In addition

, there has been

research

Change the verb form

researching

researched

show examples

about that.

For example

, the top ten risky

sports

are boxing, MMA, football, rugby, hockey, soccer, NASCAR and motocross, skiing, X-Games and basketball respectively.

Furthermore

, these games are the most played and watched recreational activities.

In addition

, many more deaths are caused by road accidents than by playing

sports

, yet nobody would consider banning driving.

Besides

, most people who take up a sport are aware of the risks associated with it. We might be able to greatly reduce the risk of injury with better coaching, stricter rules and enhanced

sports

types of equipment. İn conclusion, while ı acknowledge that extreme

sports

should be prohibited owing to they are dangerous, people are not doing anything to make

sports

safer and extreme

sports

can cause stress and other health problems, I would argue that they should not be forbidden due to all

sports

are potentially unsafe, banning

sports

can not solve the problem and we may implement measures to prevent injuries and death.

Submitted by ssunay2017 on Sat May 07 2022

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

284 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary
engagement
incentives
obesity
recreation
well-being
peer pressure
physical fitness
endurance
balance
teamwork
coordination
confidence
self-esteem
discipline
facilities
accessible
affordable
curriculum
extracurricular
inclusion

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