People today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?

It is true that these days
do not have a feeling of safety whether they are in their own house or when they are in public places or in the street. While the causes of
problem can be identified, I believe that some solutions could help to lessen
fear. The perception that society is unsafe and
are at risk even at home stems from at least two reasons. One of the major causes is probably the huge gap between the rich and the poor in a community which leads to the rising crime rate.
For instance
, burglary and robbery have become increasingly common in Vietnam or even offenders steal and rob properties from others as their “job” or livelihood. Another reason might be the dangerous situations
encounter on the street from careless drivers or traffic jams. Unfortunately, severe accidents could happen with
who obey traffic rules well. In many recent news reports, hundreds of car incidents were caused by those who totally get drunk or at high speed, and sadly the victims are innocent good citizens. Some simple measures should be implemented to deal with these root causes of insecurity.
, authorities not only take responsibility for educating and improving residents’ awareness of crimes but
invest in providing
with job training courses.
As a result
could have a chance to be well-educated and escape from poverty.
, they have no reason to take things from others to make a living.
, CCTV should be fully equipped in every corner of big cities and towns in order to track bad-behaved and illegal users on the roads. As a consequence, many city dwellers might feel safer when they are out in public areas with security video cameras surroundings to make sure all happenings are
Replace the word

The word records doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
Change preposition
from time

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
to time. In conclusion, the problem of poverty as a cause of crimes and the problem of road safety can be tackled by effective solutions, giving
a greater sense of security.
Submitted by leanhhaohust on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Check IELTS Writing Task 1 and Task 2 Online
After you write your essay, you will be provided with tips with examples of how to make your essay better in order to get a score above 7.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays:
The best new way to check your essay
Writing9 scans your text for all types of mistakes, from typos to sentence structure problems and beyond.