some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

With the rapid development of ,medicine folk live more than in the past. The vast majority of the population ponder that as the average life expectancy increases today , the nation's withdrawal of old age needs to be extended . I completely disagree with

this

Linking Words

opinion and I will explain

this

Linking Words

in my essay.

First

Linking Words

of all, high aged nation are not influenced the work efficiency oppositely to work development. Because of one less reaction and chronicled illness , sick leaves are always banned from their mobility.

Such

Linking Words

illnesses stimulate humans allowing more time for their health. Prolonging pullout youth is impairing

this

Linking Words

occasion.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, it reduces the employment rate of many young societies. What I mean by

this

Linking Words

, is

this

Linking Words

not only decreases the workplace but

also

Linking Words

deprive youngs in increase their duty and

this

Linking Words

s not give job satisfaction to youngs when they always use the same old ideas

instead

Linking Words

of their perfect and advanced ideas.

Secondly

Linking Words

, grandparenting is the base of our society.

For instance

Linking Words

, great upbringing and utmost nursing in children and young generation relative to grandparents. Because they teach modesty and ethics uniquenesses to children .

That is

Linking Words

, they are providers of traditional cultural values.

Similarly

Linking Words

, when folk retire , they start a new life , they begin to realize their unattainable dreams, and they rid o various work pressures. To infer, I think it is a mistake to extend the retirement age as longevity increases. Prolonging the withdrawal age due to the increase in the average life will cause inconvenience , not convenience , to young and old humans.

Submitted by uluga2002 on Thu May 19 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

266 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Museums and art galleries are claimed to be unimportant as people have access to see historical objects or art works by computer. In my opinion, that action can be categorized as a form of disrespect to the artist, specifically if we view it illegaly, who may had painted with all their money and tears.
5.5
band
These days consumers are faced with an increasing amount of advertising from various companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertising? What measures should be taken to protect them?
In recent years the influx of advertisements has prevailed in most sectors of our lives, especially on social media and on the Internet overall. Major corporations wielding marketing tools may pose a potential threat and adversely affect their clients. It is imperative to delve into various solutions to protect customers around the world.
<4
band
Some people say that too much attention and too many resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion.
Majority of individuals talk that so much attention and many foods,drinks are given in the defend of livestocks and many birds. This essay about wildlife and their protection. And addition to, we keep animals of extend species.
7.5
band
The growth of consumerism has led to a throw-away culture where people are more concerned with acquiring material possessions than protecting the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.
To begin, the surge in advertising and media influence has fueled consumerist behaviour, encouraging individuals to acquire the latest products for social status and personal satisfaction. The availability of cheap, mass-produced goods has made it easier for people to dispose of items hastily rather than repairing or reusing them, contributing to the throw-away culture.
7.5
band
People think that the government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve environmental problems. Give your opinion.
It is widely believed that one solution to address environmental issues would be that governments should impose high costs for private cars and other means of transportation. While I consider that might be a useful short-term measure, I would argue that others might have even greater impact in the long-term period.

some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days consumers are faced with an increasing amount of advertising from various companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertising? What measures should be taken to protect them?

Some people say that too much attention and too many resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

The growth of consumerism has led to a throw-away culture where people are more concerned with acquiring material possessions than protecting the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

People think that the government should increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles to solve environmental problems. Give your opinion.