Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social, and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

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Introduction

As modern society has become more and more competitive and complex, our next generation faces more pressures from different fronts, ranging from education to social relationships.

Consequently

Linking Words

, the well-being of a child could suffer, but

this

Linking Words

can be addressed by providing more support and changing expectations from teachers and parents.

Body paragraph 1

There are a variety of problems that cause a child to feel stressed nowadays.

First,

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the competition in modern society is fierce.

In particular

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, with limited places at selective colleges and universities, children need to prepare for different types of interviews and entrance exams, and they must do well in public exams.

As a result

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, they are often under immense pressure for the expectations of others and themselves.

Second,

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the circle of school life is wider than that at home, which means the young people must learn how to work with people from different backgrounds.

Hence

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, those who are minorities,

for example

Linking Words

, could face more challenges in overcoming the stereotypes and prejudices from others in learning.

Body paragraph 2

Effective solutions to the youth's academic and social stress should come from schools and families. With respect to teachers,

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

should recognise the individual differences of students, respect that each student has different talents, and everyone has the potential to improve themselves.

For instance

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, schools should provide mental health training and teach students how to build resilience to stress. With respect to parents, they should spend more time listening to their children.

In other words

Linking Words

, they should let their children know their parents love them and that the family is their ultimate support. As

such

Linking Words

, the youth would feel safer and less worried when faced with new challenges and they experience failures.

Conclusion

In conclusion, the youth face more stress

due to

Linking Words

the increased competition and complexity of the modern world. If individual differences were recognised and the necessary support for upholding the young people's well-being were provided, these conditions would be alleviated.

Peter Chan

May 27, 2022

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task response

You have provided a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing all parts of the question.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay is well-structured with a logical flow of ideas and clear connections between sentences and paragraphs. Good use of cohesive devices and linking words.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

318 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

academic pressure
globalized world
competitive education system
social media influences
cyberbullying
commercial pressures
aggressive marketing
materialistic desires
peer pressure
high expectations
standardized testing
quantifiable performance
stress and anxiety
extracurricular achievements

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Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems?

Some people say that computer skills should be added to primary subjects in elementary school, such as reading, writing, and math. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that school children should not be given homework by their teachers, whereas others argue that homework plays an important role in the education of children. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?