IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Government should spend money on rail way rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #money #rail #roads
In recent years, due to population growth and increasing the demand for travelling, public transportations especially trains have become popular.
as a result
, the government must arrange a plan and set a budget for railways to expand and develop them,
however
 travelling by cars and journeys on roads, still has their own enthusiast ,well The reasons for my stands will be explained.
First
, due to the significant increase in cars which is has brought Pollutions and causes considerable problems and issues
such
 as respiratory diseases and erosion of buildings and structures, travelling by train would be a reasonable selection, as it can help to reduce environmental problems.
besides
, by ,railways the Trouble of getting stuck in traffic would disappear or at least considerably decrease.
Secondly
, since the costs of taking public transport are lower than a private vehicle,
consequently
 people are able to save their money in order to spend it on many other things ,
furthermore
, by train, they can rest and enjoy the road rather than getting exhausted. To conclude , investment in railway and promotion is crucial to make them more equipped, more comfortable, and quicker which encourages people to be their
first
 choice in their journey .
as a result
, it must be done as soon as possible.
Submitted by kosar  on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: