Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and Education? Or is it the responsibilities of the government of poorer nations to look after their citizen themselves?
It is now a debatable issue whether
influencial
Correct your spelling
influential
countries
are meant to distribute their money
to some countries
that are less privileged in terms of food
and study. Or if the authorities of those countries
should be held responsible for taking care
of their natives as regards to
feeding and studying. I totally agree with the Change preposition
apply
later
that Correct your spelling
latter
suggest
, Change the verb form
suggests
governments
Correct word choice
that governments
care
for their citizens
themselves as this
will curb embezzlement of public funds and as well encourages maximum participation in discharging their duties.
On one hand, it is the right of the people to be taken care
of by their authorities using the country's wealth
no matter how negligible especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
those
Correct determiner usage
the
money
they realize from natural mineral resources, forestry and taxes that are being payed
by the individuals.The main reason for collecting tax from the Correct your spelling
paid
citizens
is to raise money
for their growth and comfortability in the nation,and in a situation where this
is implemented, it will drastically reduce the rate at which the masse's money
are
being stolen.Change the verb form
is
moreover
,food
and education
is seen as an integral part of every individual that exists on planet earth. Without food
, there will be no growth while education
is the key to a
brighter productive future developments,and when these are neglected,the nation tends to experience Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
set
Correct your spelling
setbacks
backs
Replace the word
back
on
every of its enterprise because they have diverted some of the Change preposition
in
wealth
meant for the natives to better their lives for their own personal gains especially when the aim using those funds for the masse's education
and feeding were not actualized.
Furthermore
, authorities have mushrooming dividends for a genre of sectors in their administration, that takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
care
of their citizens
needs. Change to a genitive case
citizen's
citizens'
For example
, in Nigeria,there is a ministry of food
and agriculture that takes care
of everything concerning feeding in the country, making sure that their
are availability and accessibility of Replace the word
there
food
throughout the year. When they are allowed to take care
of their citizens
,it tends to widen their horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
as
ensures maximum participation as each sector has recognized their responsibilities and can go Correct word choice
and
extra
mile to deliver as he believes that the mantle is on his shoulder.
Add an article
the extra
On the other hand
,when other wealthy nations are allowed to distribute their wealth
in taking care
of poor countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
education
and food
,it tends to promote over dependency and encourages stealing of available public funds as they will depend solely on foreign countries
aid in taking Change noun form
countries'
country's
care
of their responsibilities. Recent research made by professor Soyinka,
suggested that Remove the comma
apply
low
productivity and bad governance we experience witness today in our country are prompted by Correct article usage
the low
Add a hyphen
over-reliance
over reliance
on other international bodies for help on what should be their sole responsibility.
In conclusion, I am of the opinion that it will be more advantageousCorrect your spelling
overreliance
,
if the governments will take Remove the comma
apply
care
of their citizens
themselves as this
will limit stealing
of the masse's Correct article usage
the stealing
wealth
and encourages them to maximize their full potential in taking care
of their duties in the nation. 377wordsSubmitted by agozie2018 on
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Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.