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Band 3

Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#companies #sponsor #sports #people
While some
people
 believe that it is advantageous for firms to promote themselves by sponsoring sports, others argue that there are detrimental effects to
this
 action. I will provide an explanation
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 both sides of
this
 statement in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
,
athletes
 could build positive images for the
companies
 if they become successful. Sponsorship from the
companies
 could benefit the
athletes
 who are unable to afford satisfactory sports equipment. With better sport wears,
athletes
 can perform better during competitions,
thus
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 a higher chance of winning medals, which in
turns
Fix the agreement mistake
turn
show examples
 build a good reputation for the
companies
.
Secondly
, society is encouraged to exercise. With adequate funds from the
companies
, there would be an increase in publicity and popularity for a particular sport.
This
 would encourage
people
 to pick up the sports and start exercising, thereby promoting a healthy lifestyle in society.
On the other hand
, sponsorship from
companies
 is heavily dependent on the chosen
athletes
. If a player is involved in criminal activities
such
 as illegal
drugs
Change the noun form
drug
show examples
 usage, society would have a negative impression
towards
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the sponsoring
companies
. Another disadvantage is that certain
companies
 could advocate unhealthy habits to the public.
For example
, increase publicity in cigarettes company or junk food
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 could cause more
people
 to smoke or eat junk food. It is common that
people
 would tend to support the
companies
 that sponsor their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
 players.
Submitted by ktchien104 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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