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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many animal species are becoming extinct as a result of human activities. What are the causes and possible solutions to this problem?

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Over the
last
Linking Words
 century, the extinction of species is a greater threat to the ecosystem due to
an
Correct article usage
the
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 unacceptable behaviour of human beings
towards
Change preposition
toward
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 the environment.
Although
Linking Words
 a plethora of reasons for the extinction
such
Linking Words
 as
deforestation
Use synonyms
 and telephone
technology
Use synonyms
 is always on the top of the list are there yet some solutions
by
Change preposition
apply
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planting trees and by deprecating
non
Add a hyphen
non-enviromentally
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enviromentally
Correct your spelling
environmentally
 friendly
Use synonyms
technology
Replace the word
technicians
show examples
 are available to mitigate
this
Linking Words
 risk.
Firstly
Linking Words
, to commencing with the causes which are responsible for some animals becoming extinct.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, Across the globe many cities expanding their radius
Add the comma(s)
, as a result,
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as a result
Linking Words
 they have to destroy forests which leads some animals to
loose
Replace the word
lose
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 their shelters and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food, due to which they diminish.
For instance
Linking Words
, As per the recent environmental report, In Bengal, India, the number of tigers population in 1990 was around 6000 and due to urbanization now
count
Correct article usage
the count
show examples
 reduced to around 2000.
Besides
Linking Words
deforestation
Use synonyms
, modern
technology
Use synonyms
 like
5
Correct article usage
the 5
show examples
G phone network is one of the challenges,
this
Linking Words
 service emits certain frequency waves due to which innocent birds cannot fly or live.
For example
Linking Words
, In the
last
Linking Words
 year, The numerous sparrows across the globe
are died
Change to the active voice
died
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due
Add the preposition
todue
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this
Linking Words
 latest
technoloy
Correct your spelling
technology
. Be that as it may, solutions exist to address the above issues. To combat
deforestation
Use synonyms
, policymakers and
indiviuals
Correct your spelling
individuals
 must plant more trees
bring
Fix the infinitive
to bring
show examples
 back the destroyed life to the forests and corporates must donate some of their profits for environmental conservation. To fight
technology
Use synonyms
 issues, authorities should increase the scrutiny related to the
ecosytem
Correct your spelling
ecosystem
 before approving any new
technology
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, to recapitulate unquestionable the problem of the extinction of species is a global problem because of
deforestation
Use synonyms
 and improved telephone
technology
Use synonyms
 which can be addressed using the above-mentioned solutions to save animals for our future generations.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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