Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

A highly controversial issue today relates to whether any knowledge gained is a waste. A particular population group believes that art is an important course for offspring at school
while
others think
otherwise
. In the essay, I will be looking at both points of view and explain why I believe that craft is essential knowledge.
To begin
with, there are a number of arguments in support of my stance, the most preponderant is that evidently, what kids learn
while
growing up sharpens their behaviour and
also
has an effect on their career choices.
For example
, in developed countries like the US, someone can find special
profession
Replace the word
professional
show examples
classes to enrol their children like ballet, gymnastics, and many more.
As a result
, these folks with early training turn out to be future world champions in these areas.
On the other hand
, It can
as well
Rephrase
also
show examples
be seen as a waste of time for parents who already have plans for their offspring. Clearly,
this
set of people aspires for their children to end up with professional careers like medical doctors, lawyers, engineers and all
what not
Correct your spelling
whatnot
show examples
.
For instance
, parents who have a course plan mapped out for their folks would see art lessons as a distraction towards the goal and
therefore
be wary of them getting injured in the process of practising
such
lessons.
However
, it is advised that offspring should not be forced to follow a certain career path. In summary, to recapitulate the aforementioned argument,
While
a certain group of persons believe the introduction of craft in school for kids is time-wasting, others,
nevertheless
, feel it is essential. I strongly affirm the notion that it should be made available and compulsory for kids to learn art at an early stage to foster growth and help build their career choices.
Submitted by obinna.omeoga on

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coherence cohesion
Develop a clear and focused structure for the essay to improve coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Fully address all aspects of the task, presenting a well-reasoned argument and providing relevant examples.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-expression
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving
  • cultural awareness
  • tolerant society
  • STEM subjects
  • employability
  • rigorous subjects
  • curriculum
  • school budgets
  • enriches
  • complements
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