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Band 4.5

some people think that increasing communication usuage of computers and mobile phones by young people has had a negative effect on their reading and writing skills. to what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #communication #usuage #computers #phones #effect #skills
In
this
 tech-savvy modern world, youth across the globe
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 chat applications to communicate with other people. Some people claim that desktop and mobile communication applications negatively impact the current generation's reading and writing abilities. I completely agree that usage of
this
 program demands using expression language(smileys) and short forms. To commence with reading, nowadays, some teenagers use message reader
assistants
 that will automatically read e-messages,
as a result
,
eventually
Add a comma
eventually,
show examples
 students lose reading skills.
For instance
, voice
assistants
 like Amazon Alexa, Apple Siri, and Google any one of these
assistants
 are part of a smartphone or smart home device which will assist us in reading input messages and e-books.
In addition
 to
assistants
, these days
instead
 of using
words
 youth tend to use smileys to express their feelings
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
deprecats
Correct your spelling
deprecates
depreciates
words
 in memory.
For example
, every smartphone keyboard has an option to send a laughing face
instead
 of expressing it in
words
.
Besides
 reading, there are many hidden drawbacks to using modern keyboards for writing
such
 as auto spelling correction and grammar correction
software
 impact writing capabilities during online interactions.
Firstly
, the latest mobiles automatically correct the
words
 or suggest synonyms
due to
 which youth do not need to store spellings and appropriate synonyms,
as a result
, some folks completely lose their vocabulary in
foreseen
Correct article usage
the foreseen
show examples
 future.
In addition
 to spelling correction, the latest keyboards come with
software
 like Grammarly which will correct grammar mistakes in a sentence automatically.
Thus
,
due to
such
technology
Add a comma
technology,
show examples
 teenagers become lazy and never learn the beauty of English grammar.
Finally
, to recapitulate, undoubtedly, modern technology in communication is serving human beings
andis
Correct your spelling
and is
a reason for globalization.
However
, some
software
 makes human beings lazy and
diminish
Correct subject-verb agreement
diminishes
show examples
 reading and writing skills
due to
 the aforementioned reasons
such
 as smileys, shortcut language, and auto-correction
software
.
Submitted by rana on

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coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion need improvement. The essay lacks a clear thesis statement at the beginning and a concise summary of the main points at the end.
task achievement
The essay sufficiently addresses the task and provides relevant examples. However, ensure that the ideas are consistently clear throughout and the examples directly support the main points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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