Some children spend hours every day on their smart phones. Why is this the case? Do you think thi is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #phones #case #thi #development

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The more developed the technology, the more terrible impacts on the

peoples’

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people’s

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daily lives. Especially, some

children

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spend most of

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time

Correct pronoun usage

their time

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using their

smartphones

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To begin

Linking Words

with

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,with

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the fact that nowadays only learning is significantly popular for several cases

such

Linking Words

as covid19, military coup and traffic jam. Some parents are not patient enough to be stuck in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

traffic jam when they take their

children

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to school.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they claim that

this

Linking Words

is one of the ways to waste their

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children

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children's

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precious

time

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Children

Use synonyms

are forced to learn their lessons

Change preposition

apply

show examples

online by their parents because they have no

chances

Fix the agreement mistake

chance

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to study in the classroom.

Subsequently

Linking Words

, their eyes are always on the screen of their

smartphones

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. If there is no physical exercise, it will be

awful

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the awful

an awful

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impact on their health. After that,

Children

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cannot have the skills

which

Correct word choice

that

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all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

teenagers

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should have

such

Linking Words

the

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apply

show examples

communication skill, the participating in physical activities.

Secondly

Linking Words

teenagers

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spend their leisure

time

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using

smartphones

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with their own

chocies

Correct your spelling

choices

. They have been addicted to using

smartphones

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because there are many applications that can attract their attention

such

Linking Words

as games,

you tube

Correct your spelling

youtube

show examples

Change the capitalization

Twitter

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twitter

Correct word choice

and twitter

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Although

Linking Words

playing

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

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all the

time

Use synonyms

are

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show examples

too

monotous

Correct your spelling

monotonous

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

play,

teenagers

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are still obsessed with playing

Add an article

the game

a game

show examples

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

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. Even though

this

Linking Words

is the free

time

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that can do other activities

such

Linking Words

as cycling, swimming and running, they believe that smartphone is the only way to use

free

Add an article

the free

show examples

time

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usefully. In conclusion, from my point of view,

this

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case is obviously

the

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negative development not only in

teenagers

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but

also

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in adults for the reasons that I mentioned above.

Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on Fri Jun 24 2022

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

266 words

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Some children spend hours every day on their smart phones. Why is this the case? Do you think thi is a positive or a negative development?

Your opinion

In some countries, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this messages?

Have you recently bought a mobile phone? Write a review about the phone explaining why you bought it, how easy it is to use and if you would recommend it to others.

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that young people bring more profit to the company. Others says that older people actually bring more profits. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

With the widespread use of the internet , more people choose to work from home . Do the advantages of this trends oughtweigh the disadvantage?