Mobile phones have changed the way people communicate. Nowadays people cannot live without them if they want to be a part of society. To what extent do you think this is true? Why do you think some people have not adapted to this type of communication?

#phones #people #part #society #type #communication

Nowadays,

people

rely too much on technology when they communicate with other

people

. I strongly agree that

this

situation is happening to our society. In spite of

this

, there are others who choose not to be dependent on

this

method of communicating.

This

essay will discuss both kinds of

people

. It is true that the public today is using their gadgets as an essential factor in life.

For example

, those

people

always bring their gadgets everywhere and never lose contact with new updates or notifications. Another fact is that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because they need to keep in touch with the societies. Those who communicate and socialize through mobile phones can attain new information quickly. To illustrate

this

, we can see modern

people

's habits like the use of chatting applications like telegram or Whatsapp to get in touch with specific friends by joining chat groups.

Furthermore

, some

people

spend their time on networking applications not only by posting personal information but

also

by searching for their relative's news.

However

, there are some

people

who do not want to follow these trends. The

first

reason is limited access to technological devices.

For example

people

who live in poorer countries and remote areas do not have the privileges and money to purchase gadgets.

In addition

, they are the older generation who possess less knowledge and ability to use technologies. In spite of world evolution, those feel comfortable with the traditional way and it is not wrong.

Hence

, If they could not allow modern style, it does not mean they are not a part of human society. To conclude, there are groups of communities that depend their everyday lives on technology, and there are others who prefer not to adapt to

this

advancement.

This

is optional and we must appreciate human decisions. So, I suggest accepting those that do not want to use a modern style in the way of communication.

Submitted by vivirantung on Tue Jun 28 2022

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

315 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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