The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Today's world relies heavily on the
internet
. Like a coin with two sides, the
internet
has its own merits and demerits. The first and most significant disadvantage of the
internet
is
cybercrime
. We see numerous cases of
money
theft reported worldwide, facilitated by advanced
internet
technologies, particularly related to
money
transfers. In
this
essay, we will discuss how to reduce
cybercrime
and ensure user safety through government control.
To begin
with,
cybercrime
contributes to around 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of crime cases reported worldwide. One major reason for
this
is the unrestricted availability of the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. Because of
this
, people with a thief's mindset take advantage of it to steal
money
.
For instance
, the state of Uttar Pradesh in India has reported the highest
cybercrime
rate among its peers
due to
the significant amount of
money
stolen via the
internet
. Authorities can impose some rules to control
internet
usage,
such
as regulating the dark web, which is directly involved in cybercrimes.
Besides
, one shouldn't forget that the current generation enjoys many facilities because of advancements in the
internet
and technology.
On the other hand
, if the government controls
internet
accessibility, it will make many nations similar to North Korea, leading to frustration among people, especially the younger generation.
For example
, one can see a clear difference in the regime of North Korea compared to the remaining 126 countries.
As a result
, our world could become less peaceful
due to
an increase in crime reports. The major reason for
this
is that we didn't grow up in
such
an environment, so a quick change in people's
regimen
Fix the agreement mistake
regimens
show examples
would create more issues.
To sum up
, in my opinion, it is good to implement some rules for the usage of the dark web and sites that do not ensure ethical hacking or legal
internet
usage.
However
, I disagree with the statement that the government should control the
internet
to reduce
cybercrime
and ensure user safety for the reasons mentioned above.
Submitted by praneeth2094 on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task, discussing both sides of the argument. However, your examples could be more varied and detailed to strengthen your arguments further.
coherence cohesion
The logical flow of the essay is generally good. However, try to ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. For instance, you could use more linking words and phrases to enhance coherence.
task achievement
Consider elaborating on your main points with more specific examples or case studies. This will make your arguments more convincing and provide better support for your stance.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, making your essay easy to follow and understand.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced perspective and a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybercrime
  • regulations
  • monitoring
  • suspicious activities
  • internet safety
  • user trust
  • e-commerce
  • censorship
  • freedom of speech
  • access to information
  • over-regulation
  • innovation
  • tech industry
  • data protection
  • identity theft
  • financial fraud
  • technical limitations
  • digital landscape
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